A couple of weeks ago I completed my level 2 training. And it turned out to be as emotional than the first. Soon I realized that I was going through the exact same motion as in level 1 training.
I was going through a very common adaptation curve.
I arrived at training with the feeling of a honeymoon. Prompting myself with all the good reasons why I am doing this, feeling excited and adventurous. Happily realizing on day one that I could recall most things without a problem.
Then reality kicked in, I am reminded of all the things I do not know yet and there are a new bunch of people who seem a bit rusty – having to get used to each other.
I get tired and frustration sets in, I am impatient. And that is when all the doubts start popping up in my head again. Why am I doing this? Suddenly all my reasons don’t seem enough anymore. This might be too much for me after all?
But as I can’t walk out, – I cope and I am ok.
I start adapting, creating my little universe. This seems lightly written down as if it is easy. It isn’t easy by any means, yet it is something very human. It is an asset that we all have in us if we spend long enough doing something because in the end our comfort zone is made out of our habits.
And therefore, after some time my spirit starts to go up again. Instead of focusing on all the negative and unknown I enjoy moments of connection with new crewmates and having a great day of sailing in perfect conditions. It makes me realize that I have taken another step in learning and integrating my learnings.
So I conclude that feelings pass, also the bad ones. No need to panic.
We only get the feelings we can handle.
So even if we are overwhelmed sometimes, its good to realize that we are not stuck in this emotion, eventually we move on. So it’s ok for these emotions to just appear and go by. No need to judge or beat myself up for having them. Its how I deal with them that makes the difference.
As humans, we do not progress in a linear fashion
We move through curves; after the honeymoon, reality kicks in, and we move to a crisis point. Things are more difficult as the thought or the strategies to cope are not working or the environment is different from what we anticipated, we might react differently than we expected.
Here we have a choice, we can either give up and move back to our comfortable state. Or, we gather our courage and push on – just a little bit more, out of our comfort zone, and we will move on. On and out of the dip. The reward is growth and progress.
I am thinking about how comfortable I am in my life. I do what I am good at, and then I do some more of that. Because we do what makes us feel good, right? Seems sane.
But sometimes you have to move through bad feelings in order to get to the good ones. Humans are meant to be challenged. It makes me feel alive.